Subject: Military Tank Crashes into Garden Fence
From: Alex Kemp
Date: Thursday, 12 February 2015 13:30:30 +0000
To: Oliver Kemp, Micaela Kemp, Liisa Kemp, Davin Kemp

Darling, I’m Home

Because this occurred in Germany, and because the tank was British, it is hardly news. Indeed, the tank could have been British, American or German & it would not be new: British & German tanks have been running around Germany ever since World War II and, let’s face it, German tanks have also made a habit of crashing into gardens all over Europe ever since they were built. Indeed, I think that a point could be established that the very design of tanks is so that they can crash into gardens. Still, lets go with the story, whilst having a little voice whispering in our ear “is that really news?”.

Ulrich and Magdalene Tilsner live in Paderborn, Germany, not far away from a military driving school owned by the Paderborn Garrison of the British Army (I wonder if their Domestic Insurance Company know of that fact?). The armoured Warrior infantry fighting vehicle pictured above, which is clearly lethal to garden walls and may well stop bullets but hardly looks like it would prove proof to an 88 shell from a Tiger Tank, was being operated by the driving school on Tuesday 10 January 2015 when it suddenly took a dislike to Mr. & Mrs. Tilsne’s cosy little home & swerved off the road.That gave Ulrich one of the better excuses to give to his granddaughter:- “I’m a bit late, I have a tank in the garden”.

Alex Kemp